The Phone Call Before the Potential First Date

I admit: I absolutely hate talking on the phone. The idea of phone dating in a long distance relationship is even more horrifying. The phone call before the first date always made me a bit nervous, as my friends told me my voice sounded like I was just napping. To help you avoid my mistakes, here are some quick phone call tips to keep in mind before the imminent first date:

1. Don’t be natural.
Everyone always says to “be natural.” But, come on. When you try to come across as being natural, it seems contrived. Just try to sound friendly and upbeat when you pick up the phone.

2. Have a script to avoid um-ing.
If you’re so nervous that you’re afraid you’re going to stutter or um-oh-um them to unhealthy levels of insanity, it’s not a bad idea to have a short outline of what you’d like to say. While this is certainly not a business phone call, it may help relax you to have a plan. This may be a particularly good idea for those who are afraid of long lulls in conversation.

3. Ask questions – it’s not just about you.
One of the biggest complaints I hear from friends of mine who are going on first dates is that their date never asked them any questions. Don’t be a narcissist. If you have to ask yourself if you’re a narcissist, you probably are. Take this simple advice: after responding to a question, ask a question. Keep the conversation well-balanced.

4. Laugh – but not like a hyena.
Doesn’t everyone write in their profiles that they’re looking for someone with a sense of humor? Have one.

5. Be direct and not directionless.
Does it sound like you’re having a connection over the phone? Say so. Then ask if they’d like to meet for a first date. If the person isn’t interested in you and you’re not interested in them, figure this out on the phone rather than after the first date. We’re all busy, so don’t waste their time and they won’t waste yours.

First Date Email

Five Steps on How To Write The First Date Email Request!

1. Pay attention to your prospect’s profile.
I once had a guy write to me and say, “Have you ever been to Europe?!!!!” My profile spoke explicitly about living in Paris and Prague so either a. He didn’t read my profile, or, even worse, b. He read it, and didn’t realize that Paris and Prague were in Europe.

2. !!!!!!!!
Don’t do this.

3. :> ;>
Don’t do this either.

4. LOL! Ha Ha!
Knock it all off already.

5. Flirt
Flirt, don’t offend. One guy wrote this to me: “Ooh, I can see that you totally need a spanking!” Really? I had a not-so-flattering picture of me eating Cambodian noodles with my hair a serious mess.

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