Okay.

I need some major help.  Actually, Jen, this may be useful for you and The Lawyer, as well, when you write your wedding vows.

I’m looking at non-traditional wedding vows, and can’t believe how many of them still include God, Jesus and not a single reference to Domestic Goddesses and Partners!  Sacrilege!

Anyway.

Which is your absolute fave?

DomestiVow #1:

Dear Doctor, I take you to be my husband from this time onward,
to join with you and to share all that is to come, to be your faithful Domesti-wife,
to give and to receive, to speak and to listen, to inspire and to respond;
a commitment made in love, kept in faith, and eternally made new.

DomestiVow #2:

You have become mine forever.
Yes, we have become partners.
I have become yours.
Hereafter, I cannot live without you.
Do not live without me.
Let us share the joys.
We are word and meaning, unite.
You are thought and I am sound.

May the nights be honey-sweet for us.
May the mornings be honey-sweet for us.
May the plants be honey-sweet for us.
May the earth be honey-sweet for us.

(Ahem, clearly I only like this one because it brings up honey every 5 seconds.  As you all know, The Doctor and I love honey and want to be bee-keepers!)

The Doctor and Sue in their 80s!

DomestiVow #3 (Actually called The Eskimo Love Song… Jen, did I ever tell you how I was once mistaken for an Eskimo when I was at a bar in Dublin?):

You are my husband
My feet shall run because of you
My feet shall dance because of you
My heart shall beat because of you
My eyes see because of you
My mind thinks because of you
And I shall love because of you.
DomestiVow #4

To My Dear and Loving Husband, my Anne Bradstreet

If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee;
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me ye women if you can.
I prize they love more than whole mines of gold,
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought by love from thee give recompense.
Thy love is such I can no way repay;
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
Then while we live, in love let’s so persevere,
That when we live no more we may live ever.

Well?  Any DomestiGal out there want to share their bee-u-ti-ful wedding vows?

Love,

Vowless Sue

What better way to start off a Monday than on a complete downer.  (Sorry, DomestiGals!)  Here’s one couple that I hope never, ever get married.

Rihanna, please don't say "I Do."

This whole thing is upsetting to me on multiple levels.  I totally heart Rihanna’s music, but now I’m going to have a hard time listening to her.  She’s young at 21 — she has so much time to date other jerks, why waste more time with Chris Brown?

Then, there’s everyone’s favorite recently-separated couple, Madonna and Guy Ritchie.  Here’s a picture of them, courtesy ABC News, of Madonna (or “It” as Guy apparently refers to his ex-wife) and Guy renewing their wedding vows!

Madonna and Guy Ritchie Renewing High Brow Vows

Yes, while 50% of marriages end in divorce, Madonna has quite a way of rebounding back with the newest hottie.

Look at who she took to the Oscars as her post-party treat!

Madonna and Brazilian Model: The Next High Brow Vows?

(photo courtesy The Insider)

I know Sean Penn didn’t have very loving words to say to Madonna when they bumped into each other at the Oscar’s, but perhaps it’s because he’s still mad about the wedding dress The Material Girl girl wore while they were married.

(Photo Courtesy People Magazine)

DomestiGal Jen, I’ll leave that wedding dress (and Madonna’s 80s eyebrows) review, all up to you!

Love,

Sue

Happy Monday from DomestiGal Land!

Now that our site is looking FEROSH, we decided we better have some hot new columns to keep up with the fabulosity.

So, starting this week, here’s what you can look forward to from the DomestiGals:

Highbrow Vows - a weekly drool and diss over some of the web’s best and worst wedding announcements!

DomestiGals Dish - reviews of weddings, wedding dress collections, engagement rings, wedding rings, bridal blogs, and more from the now (let’s just be honest, people) wedding-obsessed DomestiGal Jen

We will also be featuring interviews with real brides out there in the blogosphere - if you want to be one of them, email us at domestigals{at}domestigals{dot}com!

And of course, you will hear more from us and what’s happening in our lives. We’ll also continue to share the love with DomestiGals Heart and Wedding Fabulosity Fest posts.

And since it’s already Monday…

Jen and I are thrilled to announce the arrival of our every-or-maybe-every-other-Monday edition of Highbrow Vows, where we will express envy, disgust, and overall just obsess over engagement and wedding announcements in local papers, online YouTube proposals, and, everyone’s favorite, The Sunday New York Times.

Ah, yes.

You see, many Manhattan-ites buy The Sunday NY Times, pick up their morning coffee at MUD, and then find their favorite brunch spot where they will then pretend to be reading Frank Rich’s editorial.

Let me assure you that they are not reading Maureen Dowd’s editorial, either, though her titles such as Sunday’s, “Which Governor is Wackier?” that begin with, “I love Blago” (rather than Blagojevich) do seem rather DomestiGal-like.

Instead, dear DGals, they are reading The Style section, and, more specifically, the wedding announcements.  Let’s review one, shall we?

This couple meets all the qualifications of the perfect Sunday NY Times submission (because, you know, only the select few get picked).

1.  Asian Woman + Jewish Man = Duh folks, this is New York.  How (un)original!

2.  Bride + Groom attended Brown = Future Ivy League beautiful halfie babies.

3.  No picture??  What!  No picture?

DomestiGal Do: 

Always, always put in a picture.  How can we make fun of you or compliment you if you don’t?  As long as the bride doesn’t look like Donatella Versace nude, I’d say you’re going to be okay.

DomestiGal Don’t: 

Don’t put in a picture of just the bride.  It always creeps me out when brides do this.  While your husband doesn’t need to have the hot bod of Michael Phelps, I’m sure he’s still cute.

All right DomestiGals, fess up.  Send us your very special wedding announcements that were listed in your local papers and we’ll explore and adore you in our weekly Monday section, Highbrow Vows.

With special love,

Sue ‘n Jen